So so long no no blog!!----UPDATE

I don't know why it has taken me so long to write a blog entry?! I guess I just haven't been taking the time to do it. Tonight I am taking the time while my husband watches YouTube videos on TV.

I am not even sure where I have left off but I would be happy to give my most recent update. September was a great month for me and I have found myself down around 10 lbs! It was a slow summer for my weight loss since April but this fall I have really been on it and back on track. I am now in the 250's and so close to some of the lowest weights I have ever been at! The main motivation for me right now is imagining the Holidays and wanting to look and feel great seeing my family again, and of course my milestone Birthday is April is a huge goal, and my one year fit-a-versary will be in August/ Sept since that is when I really started turning a corner and getting serious about my weight loss. My one year fit-a-versary is when I plan to be 100 pounds plus down!

The reason fall (and the last few months) has been such a turning point for me is because I have been letting go of the negative and embracing the positive and using each new day as a fresh start. I have been making my workouts a commitment to myself just like work or school it is a priority and I get it in whenever I can fit it in no matter if I don't feel like it. I have taken on the 'no excuses' approach! Also, I have stopped obsessing over the scale. I weigh in once a week and have been participating in an online challenge weight loss group that has been so helpful for me. It has given me the structure and the support that I really needed. I joined the group in August and so far it has really helped me to see some great results. I still have so far to go but I am setting my goal for 10 pounds at a time with my larger goals always in mind.

I am a little sleepy this evening so I am going to go ahead and cut this short. At least it was a little update for you guys on what has been happening and where my journey is at this time. I have much more to that I could write about but I will save that for another time!

If you are new to my blog WELCOME and thanks for coming along on my journey to a healthier ME! Here is a recent picture taken just a few weeks ago! Really noticing my face slimming lately!

Where Have I Been?

From my walk today through Arbor Lodge State Park. It was so beautiful and inspiring.

 Hello my amazing readers! Did you wonder why I have not written a blog in awhile? Did you think I have given up? HA! Given up...you must not know me very well if you thought that!

My role model and a very special and inspiring person in my life has once said that there are three parts to this journey. There is the fitness part, the healthy eating part, and there is the mental part. If you talk to even a few people who have been seriously overweight they will tell you that the mental part is the hardest. I also happen to agree with these people. Please imagine something for me. Imagine the person that you dislike most in your life. This person needs to be someone you strongly dislike and someone who makes your blood boil while simply thinking of their name. Now imagine doing something nice every day for this person, helping this person, and dealing closely with this person. The person I am talking about for myself is me. I am my own worst enemy and I really do not like myself let alone love myself. I have learned that I will not be able to accomplish my weight loss goals until I learn to love myself. I need to forgive myself. I need to let go of my past mistakes. I need to stop the negative self talk.

So this is where I have been. I have been off dealing with the demons in my head. I have been attempting to get my head straight. I have been admitting to myself that I have a very large problem, and yes, an addiction to food. Honestly I have had conversations with my husband about why struggling with obesity is such a silent and lonely struggle. I am confronted with multiple people every single day who tell me it is okay that I am overweight and it's "not that bad." No, it is bad and I am tired of people sweeping this issue under the rug. It is a huge problem for me and it is only going to become more detrimental to my health as the years go by. So I am doing what I can to stop this cycle. I don't want to put this burden on my kids and I want them to remember me as healthy and active and a person who loved life and brought out the best in everyone.

Please let me address the thought of "giving up," I am never going to give up. This is going to be a struggle my entire life. I am going to keep fighting and I am going to win this. I am going to deal with my emotions, and stop eating them, I am going to take time for myself and put myself first, I am never going to stop. Even when I get to my goal weight I will not stop, then the goal will be maintenance. There will be days, weeks, and even months that I might get off track but that does not mean anything to me. I will keep pushing on, I will improve, and I will do better. Thank you for choosing to follow along this incredible journey.

*I am a very lucky girl to have such a scenic place to take walks on. The Arbor Lodge State Park is absolutely enchanting especially this time of year. It was just what I needed to clear my head, fire me up with some motivation, and lift my spirits.*

Strength in Numbers-Couch to 5K

This past week I have joined an internet weight loss group on Facebook. Our challenge is to lose 50 pounds by October! I think this group will be a great thing for me. My personal goal is to be under 200 pounds by the end of our groups challenge. So I have an extra 10 pounds, that will be no problem. It excites me so much thinking of going into the Holidays looking and feeling good. Fall is my favorite time of year and the best time to exercise outside. When I think of next summer and the possibility that I will be at my goal is even more exciting. It is a lot of hard work, but I know all of the work will reap huge rewards. I get so much love and support from friends and family, it is really a great thing that people would care enough about me to reach out and show their support. It will always be appreciated now and when I reach my goals. This past week/weekend was huge and filled with special occasions. We had graduation parties, celebrated Mother's Day, and my daughter turned 8 months old.  Support from family and friends is a huge key to weight loss, and I am so thankful to have this new Facebook group, my friends, and my amazing supportive husband and extended family. I can't wait to be at my goal and thank these people and give them the credit that has contributed to my success.

It's not that I didn't have time to work out this weekend, I didn't make time to work out. I am back on track today, with plan to continue with my Couch to 5K App and tomorrow start Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. I really enjoyed my first time doing Couch to 5K. I was nervous and was not sure what to expect, or worried that other people in the gym might think I am crazy and wonder what the heck I was doing. It was actually a blast! I have not felt so strong and so confident in a long time. It was a great feeling, after I was done I was dripping with sweat but I felt so accomplished. It was harder than I thought it would be, but it is what I need. If I am not being challenged and working hard and sweating hard and wonder if I will live to the end of the work out, than it is just not worth it!
*Couch to 5K is an iPhone app that helps beginners become able to run or run for longer periods of time. It gives voice commands that tell you when to run and when to walk. For example day number one was 60 seconds of jogging and 90 second of walking. The app alternates walking and running for 20 minutes with a 5 minute walk to warm up and a 5 minute walk to cool down.*

This is the exact app that I am using in case anyone is wondering.

Weekend Sucess and Temptation!

I am going to call the weekend a complete success! I got out and exercised both yesterday and today. Yesterday we went on a hike! It was so fun, I took my little man and my husband and we had so much fun. It was a crazy hard workout, we had to climb an extremely steep hill and by the time we got to the top I was breathing so hard. I have never gotten that much of a workout at the gym, and it was so much more enjoyable than going no where on a treadmill! Here is a photo of my husband and I on the hike.

That night we went to my in laws to eat and I was extremely hungry! They had my weakness....Taco Pizza..duh duh duhnnn. I did have 2 slices but it was my "cheat meal" for the whole week. The thing is I am not on a diet, I am changing my life. My life needs to be flexible and I refuse to feel limited or like I am being punished or can't take part in eating at family meals. My plan is to make healthy choices every meal possible, and if I feel like having a slice of pizza once I am going to have it but I am going to have the right portion of it and not the whole pizza. Moderation and watching portion size is the key here! I want to be realistic with this and I want this to be a long term thing! I know when I weigh in on Friday I am going to see results. I am proud of my actions and my eating this weekend, even with a little pizza in the mix.

Tonight I went on a walk around our neighborhood and it was the strangest turn of events. I ran into my high school Chemistry teacher (which also happens to be my brothers girlfriends mother), and after I said goodbye to her and turned onto the next street over from mine I had the most beautiful Siamese cat follow me all the way down the street (at least 3 blocks). After I got two houses away from my in laws house (they live on the same block as us) the cat got scared up into a tree by a neighbors dog! So the next 30 minutes of my workout time was spent trying to get the cat out of the tree and find its owner. Out of complete luck or circumstance the owner of the dog that ran the cat into the tree actually had an idea of who the owner might be. She made a call and soon enough the owner of the cat showed up shaken that she had lost her pretty kitty and thankful we took the time to get the cat safely out of the tree and find her owner. I think my good deed for the day was done! In all the years that I have walked my neighborhood I have never had a walk more eventful than that! Now I am going to go have a warm cup of green tea and call it a night. I promise the "cauliflower popcorn" recipe is soon to come! Here is a photo of my friend that followed me tonight-

May Challege-Yes it's ambitious! ;)

My husband and I are participating in a little bit of healthy competition. We are currently in a weight loss battle that will go on the entire month of May to see who can lose the most weight. Our goal is to lose 20lbs by the end of the month. It is ambitious I know, but if we don't reach 20lbs that is okay! We might as well strive for it, and aim for a high goal! We are also doing the squat challenge posted by shrinkingjeans.net. I really could use some toning in the booty section. I am hoping this will give us both a jump start for the summer and little extra confidence at the pool and the lake. Wish us luck and feel free to join along in either the squat challenge, or the 20lbs gone by the end of May challenge. Cheer me on so that I can win, I am not sure what the prize is besides bragging rights, but I am excited to kill it in the month of May, I hope I can inspire someone else to do the same.

We Got This!

Staying Motivated-Facebook Pages

-After my 40lb loss, I felt amazing-

Just recently I have come to realize that this weight loss goal is not a fail or succeed thing. It is a journey that I am on, it is constant and ever changing. I have been struggling with my weight since my Junior year of high school (seven years ago) when I got a little chunky, and after my pregnancy with my son when I become "obese." At that time I would yoyo diet and try fad diets and really get down on myself if I failed-meaning got off track, or not being able to achieve the unrealistic restraints of a fad or starvation diet. Fast forward to last year, I was pregnant with my daughter and had just lost 40 pounds through small diet changes and walking a few times a week. It was this time when I started following some fitness blog pages on Facebook and started to look at my weight loss goals as a journey. I started to see if I feel off track one day or even one week I could simply pick back up and do better the next day. I lost that mentality that if I was off track one day or even one meal that I was a big, fat, failure. The fitness pages gave me new suggestions, new ideas, new foods to try, and hope and inspiration that it can happen. If all these people can do it so can I! I was pregnant so I didn't feel comfortable starting anything drastic at that point but my new found inspiration did light a fire in me, and made me look forward to starting a new fitness routine and new eating habits. I was determined!
"It doesn't matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop"
-Confucius
I should add, follow my page on Facebook; look up Liz Losing It and like my page!